This week has been worse than others. Much worse. A colleague has just returned from staying in one of the 4-star hotels in Phuket Patong Beach has to offer. And doesn’t he let you know about it? It is only this week that you found out where it was, but now having seen so many photos and heard so much, you almost feel like a local.
As the saying goes, “if you can’t beat them, then join them,” and you will do just that. Despite your outer curmudgeon persona, you love nice things and broadening the mind through travel. You have a couple of weeks’ leave due, so you make the necessary bookings and look forward to the following on your first trip to Thailand.
Seeing the golden sands of Patong Beach will knock spots off UK resorts, and as for the color of the Andaman Sea. Wow, you cannot wait to dip in that without freezing off parts of your body.
You are not messing about going Cheap Charlie style. You have decided to beat the workmate at Top Trumps and go four stars, no less. You managed to keep your laughter concealed when he was obviously seething. You will stay in a beautiful room just a few minutes’ walk from that beach.
If you decide you fancy using all the amenities on offer, you will not go far wrong. Perhaps some of the time will be spent by a pool, which your hotel tells you is the largest in the Patong area. From where you might need some handy tips if you go on a boating trip.
You will certainly embrace all the activities like water-walking in a huge bubble and an aqua gym session. Maybe even a Thai Boxing class, just in case you must keep insubordination in check when you get home. What’s that? A cocktail class. Well, that could be fun and a good way to meet people, as is a Thai cooking class. Maybe you will be able to knock out a pad kra pow for friends and family when you get home.
Looking at the website, you realize that Phuket has plenty of attractions away from the hotel, which will sort everything out for you. The elephant sanctuary looks fun, as does Phuket Simon Cabaret. As Adam Ant sang, “ridicule is nothing to be scared of,” and you will be able to show your open-mindedness to some of the dinosaurs in your local pub. They might even be able to sort you out a round of golf on a local top course.
Whether you eat and drink, relax in your 4-star hotel, or head to the nearby beach, you are in for the trip of a lifetime, with colleagues looking at you with envy.